


A Man Walks Into a Bar...

by Finely Honed (jaqen_hgar)



Series: Imagine Tony & Bucky [41]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bar Room Brawl, Bucky Likes Bar Fights, Gay Bar, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Not What It Looks Like, Protective Bucky Barnes, Star Wars References, Steve Rogers Is a Good Bro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-16
Updated: 2015-06-16
Packaged: 2018-04-04 16:49:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4145283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaqen_hgar/pseuds/Finely%20Honed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><span class="small">Prompt: imagine Tony and Bucky in a bar on a date when Tony goes to get some drinks from the bar. Bucky waits ten minuets before he goes to see what's keeping Tony. when Bucky gets to the bar there's a guy hitting on Tony. Tony is clearly not interested. Bucky puts a hand around Tony's waist and starts to lead him away. the guy says something really bad to Tony and Bucky punches the guy in the face. with his left hand. a bar fight ensues and Steve has to post bail for Tony and Bucky.</span> </p><p>“Seeing all these people,” Bucky said one night, gesturing to the crowd around them, “able to just be together, without it being a big deal? Makes me proud that I fought in a war for this country.”</p><p>Tony had called him a sap, had kissed him right there on the dance floor, then spent the rest of the night holding his hand.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Man Walks Into a Bar...

Bucky felt he was more comfortable with crowds these days. For a start, he didn’t find himself so stressed out that he needed a solid hour in a closet to decompress after being out and about in the world. He could actually enjoy himself.

Going out was certainly more fun with other people. He, Sam and Steve went for runs together. Clint had introduced him to the fun that was arcades, and Natasha had been happy to discover that he liked going to the ballet. Bruce and Tony knew all the best places in New York to get food at all hours, most of them tiny mom and pop establishments that knew them by name and brought them things not on the menu. Thor, surprisingly, was big into museums, and had delighted in showing Bucky some of his favorites.

In the evenings, Tony was the guy you wanted to go out with, because he knew the best places to drink. The sort of bars where no one cared if Bucky sat a little too close, or couldn’t resist the urge to rest his hand on Tony’s thigh in the middle of a conversation.

There were all sorts of people in these bars, and none of them seemed to have a problem with anyone else, as long as you were respectful to the people around you. Bucky was partial to one place in particular, because they had live music, and no one cared if he dragged Tony out onto the dance floor.

“Seeing all these people,” Bucky said one night, gesturing to the crowd around them, “able to just be together, without it being a big deal? Makes me proud that I fought in a war for this country.”

Tony had called him a sap, had kissed him right there on the dance floor, then spent the rest of the night holding his hand.

So, a month later, when they were back there and having a perfectly nice evening, Bucky didn’t worry too much over the fact that Tony had been gone for almost ten minutes. The bar was busy, and sometimes there was a wait for drinks. He gave it a bit more time before his paranoia got the best of him, and he went to find Tony. Relief washed over him when he spotted Tony at the bar, but he could tell from his body language that Tony was annoyed.

The reason for the annoyance was a fairly good looking guy that seemed to be leering, and even made a little playful grab for Tony’s shoulder. Tony stepped aside, avoiding the contact, his jaw set.

“Hey,” Bucky said, sidling up and sliding his arm around Tony’s waist. “Crowded tonight, huh?”

“Tell me about it,” Tony grumbled, drumming his fingers impatiently against the surface of the bar.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” the other guy said a little too loudly. “Is this your boyfriend? He’s cute. Wouldn’t kick him out of bed!”

Bucky sighed, repositioned himself so he was standing between the clown and Tony, showing the guy his back. Tony leaned over the bar, muttering something under his breath about bartenders being the death of him, when Bucky felt a tap on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry, man. We were just talking about  _Star Wars_.”

Bucky looked to Tony, who just shook his head and mouthed, “don’t ask.”

“Congratulations.”

Bucky turned back around, but felt another tap.

“I’ve got all the movies at home. You should come back and we could watch ‘em together.”

“Tempting, but I’m still going to pass,” Tony called, leaning around Bucky. “How about you chat up someone else now?”

The guy laughed, and smacked Bucky on the arm. “Look, I got a great idea. We go back to my place, we put on  _Star Wars_ , and we share him!”

Bucky arched an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

“Or you two share me—I ain’t picky on that front. C’mon, man. That’d be hot. The three of us, sweating up the sheets?”

“What’s this guy’s problem?” Bucky asked Tony.

“He’s been yammering on the whole time I’ve been up here. Ignore him.”

“Hey,” the belligerent guy shouted. “Wait a minute. I know you. You’re Tony Stark!”

Tony’s shoulders slumped, his head tipping forward. “Great.”

Bucky rubbed the back of Tony’s neck. “How 'bout we skip the second round. I could go for a burger.”

“I’ve seen you on the news! I thought you were taller, man.”

Tony twitched over this comment. “A burger would be nice. Yeah, with onion rings on top.”

“Pepper is gonna yell at me if I let you do that,” Bucky said, running his fingers through Tony’s hair.

“You make all the gadgets, and stuff.”

Bucky slid his arm back around Tony’s waist and made to leave the bar. “Have a good night,” he said, channeling his inner Steve in an attempt to rise above the annoyance.

“Your tech is  _shit_ , man,” the guy said, smirking. “Give me HAMMER products any day.”

Tony groaned as Bucky tensed up. “Okay, pal, how about you just take two steps back…”

But the loudmouth wasn’t done. “You know what? I don’t even  _want_  to watch  _Star Wars_ with you, anyway. You probably like the shitty 80s garbage. The prequels are like a thousand times better than…”

“That’s not true!” To Bucky’s absolute horror, he watched his left fist connect with the guy’s face, pulling back at the last minute in an attempt to minimize the damage. Tony’s jaw had dropped, his eyes going wide, as around them people jumped back in surprise.

The asshole shook his head in an attempt to clear it, spitting a bit of blood onto the floor. “It _is_  true! Everyone thinks the prequels are better!” he shouted.

“That’s  _impossible_ ,” Bucky snapped, while Tony placed a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to keep him from going after the guy again.

“Wait, are you guys talking about the  _Star Wars_ prequels?” a woman nearby asked, her expression dark. “Those sucked so hard.”

“Yeah, those movies should never have been made!” someone else shouted. Which led to someone  _else_  nearby saying, “I dunno. I kinda thought Darth Maul was cool”

“I have a bad feeling about this,” Tony said, grabbing Bucky’s arm.

“Darth Maul was a gimmick!”

“The pod racing was cool.”

“The pod racing was  _torture_!”

All around them, people slowly turned on each other, with shouts of, “What about the Ewoks?” and “You can’t seriously be saying you think the Ewoks were  _worse_ than Jar-Jar Binks!” and “Yoda was a muppet,” and “ _You’re_  a muppet!”

Before he knew what was happening, fists were flying, and he and Tony were stuck in the middle of a full on bar fight. The bartender had magically reappeared, and was on the phone, shouting. Bucky had assume she was calling the cops.

“Sorry about the mess,” he shouted over the cacophony, but then he had his hands full as the guy he’d decked decided to come back for more.

+

Tony and Bucky sat shoulder to shoulder in their jail cell, looking a little worse for the wear.

“I can’t stop thinking about burgers,” Tony moaned, clutching his stomach. “So. Hungry.”

Bucky groaned, and rested his forehead against the top of Tony’s head. “Sorry. Seriously, I didn’t think it’d escalate like that, and…”

“Seriously, fellas?”

Bucky grinned as Captain America walked in with one of the police officers, hands in his pockets doing his best disappointed dad impression.

“It’s not my fault,” Tony swore, jumping to his feet.

Steve just laughed, and shook his head, the serious expression falling away as the cell was unlocked and his friends were released. “I’d be surprised if it was. You have  _no idea_  how many bar fights this scoundrel has been in.”

“Hey!” Bucky snapped, although, hm. He shrugged, grinned roguishly down at Tony. “Scoundrel. I like that.”

Tony just shook his head, smiling up at Bucky as they headed out of the police station. “I love you.”

Bucky slung his arm across Tony’s shoulders. “I know.”

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't resist going in a weird direction with this one...
> 
>  
> 
> You can find me on tumblr here: [dezinformatsia.tumblr.com/](http://dezinformatsia.tumblr.com/) and all of my Imagine Tony & Bucky fills can be found here: [imaginetonyandbucky.tumblr.com/tagged/dezinformatsia](http://imaginetonyandbucky.tumblr.com/tagged/dezinformatsia)


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